So, I’ve been actively seeking employment since July 1, 2011… which means I’ve been actively unemployed since July 1, 2011- (unlike the time I decided to live my life as an interesting little experiment by way of leaving the “status quo”).
Being actively unemployed is really beginning to suck… BIG TIME. I’m so bored that today I actually filed and neatly organized my journal into different sections, “Actual Journaling” “Letters of Closure” “Gratitude” “The Darndest Things People Say” “Manifesting” and “Miscellaneous Brilliant Thoughts That Don’t Have An Actual Purpose YET.”
I’ve begun experimenting with vegetarianism… I’ve experimented with quitting caffeine (that only lasted three weeks.. I find I’m much nicer when I’m caffeinated). I’ve gone on hikes, house sat, and literally watched almost the first three seasons of The Big Bang Theory with my room mate. Other fun activities include reading and offering up free “advice” to business people I’ve never met who inspire me… Yup, I am bored and have waaaay too much time on my hands.
Don’t get me wrong, I keep busy. I volunteer a few days a week and was even asked to a special meeting yesterday to specifically talk with a non-profit about how I can best serve them (as a volunteer). I’m glad that they are not just putting me anywhere and they acknowledge I have something of value to give them…. and I’m oober glad that I get to begin helping them in an area I am passionate about and fascinated by- Spirituality and Religion. However, it still doesn’t pay.
I REALLY REALLY REALLY WANT A PAY CHECK!!!!!! So much so that I’ve begun putting in resumes for service jobs. At an earlier part of a my life I would have said, “Thanks but no thanks” to any opportunity to sometimes be actively abused or disrespected by the public (with no short term end in sight) … however, now that I’ve decided to “grow-up,” I find the idea of money for paying those bills which have been quietly piling up for a little too long (and now making me uncomfortable), quite exciting…. not to mention, money for that ever so important self care and healthy food…
What can I do though? I’ve done everything in my awareness to become “normal” and find balance with my floaty free spirit. I’m putting myself out there everyday to meet people. I’ve gotten back in touch with old contacts about how I can help them. I’ve put in TONS of resumes. I volunteer. I even regularly attend a weekly spiritual service…. I attend community events, I talk to strangers… I even talk to my friends too.
I’m frustrated. I want a job. I want to start this week… or at least know I have employment this week. I want it to be fun. I’ve been putting myself out there. I have focused intention now. What else do you want from me? I’m bored and with my boredom I can think about all the creative (and even practical) ways I can use a paycheck. Pretty PLEEEEEEEASE with a cherry on top!!!!!!
I acknowledge all of your hard work. Be patient. Everything happens right on time and I’m sure there is something of value you are learning from your current situation. It takes time for everything involved with your destiny (both long and short term) to connect and fall into place. Be where you are right now. Find gratitude for this very moment and everything you do have.
Your Higher Self
Well, okay then.